Can you hear me now?

So here's the thing.

I'm not for sure if I'm doing what I should be doing. I know people and have heard of others who at some point in their lives got this calling to do something in particular; be a pastor, write a book, host a radio show, whatever. Then I read about Moses and Jonah and Samuel and others who clearly heard God ask them to lead or to speak or to act in some very specific way that forever changed the path of their lives. Then I think, "Okay. Did I miss something? Was that bush on fire and my only thought was to call 911?" .

What I do know is that God has called me to follow Him; to walk in obedience. That's fine. And if I know that what He wants from me is to simply to do that (follow Him at work, in my home, at church, etc.) , then great! I can be happy with that. But if there's something more that is being asked then I may just need a new set of ears to hear more clearly. In the meantime, I'll be as faithful as I can and wait.

Work and work

We continually remember before our God and Father your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ. - 1 Thessalonians 1:5

I work with the youth of our church. I also work in information technology. How does this verse from Paul apply? There is no question that my work with the youth is produced by faith. Although I have been doing it for over 20 years I have little clue about what I'm doing. Week by week I've learned to let go and trust God that what I have to share that week will be meaningful and that it is what suits His purpose. Without question I love these kids, that has been a constant and a source of joy. The endurance I have must come from the holy Spirit as year by year I tell myself I don't have anything left to give and yet God has been faithful. But what about my "real" job?
I love technology. I've always had a knack for understanding it and enjoy that it can be used to help others get their job done more efficiently and effectively. I'm struggling though with the idea that Paul's words would apply here. Is my work here produced by faith, prompted by love and sustained by the Holy Spirit? Can it have the same kind of meaning in God's kingdom that my work with youth has? I'm praying about that.

It Really Makes a Difference

For quite some time now I've been told and have been telling others that it is important to spend time with God. Quiet Time, devotional, whatever you want to call it. It only makes sense of course. If you are in a real relationship with someone then you spend time with them; sharing what's going on in your life and listening to what they have to share.

For the past couple of weeks, God has provided a time for He and I to be alone. I have "started" this process dozens of times in my life. This is the first time I've maintained any consistency. Three weeks!. I'm almost embarrassed to claim some form of victory in that length of time. But it is what it is and it has made a difference. I look back at the end of my days and can reflect on a change in my days. Where they were once scatterred and unfocused, there has developed a purpose. There are moments that God catches me to be obedient in or to stop and pray about. There is fruit, or at least places where the seed for fruit has been planted. Spend time with Him. His promise is to bless it.

Thumbs-up

The truth is; I care about what you think of this blog. It matters to me that you appreciate these postings in someway. (Of course as I write this there’s no indication anyone else has even read them!) Perhaps that's not such a bad thing in and of itself, but the fact of the matter is my concern for your opinion is at the root of what's wrong with me. It is a sign of selfishness; an outward indicator that there is much within that loves me more than others; in particular God. It is representative of fear. It limits the effectiveness of my ministry and often prevents me from serving Him altogether.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others – Phil 2: 3-4

One of the things God has been doing with me recently is pointing out how pervasive this need for approval is in my life right now. Thank you God. If I’m ever going to mature, I need to develop the same attitude that was in Christ Jesus…for His Glory and not my own.

Me B.C. ?

I was listening to a radio show earlier this evening. The host asserted that "everyone has a testimony, whether they know it or not". I suppose that's true. He suggested that a testimony consists of what your life was like before Christ (B.C.) and what it has been like since.
I've always struggled with sharing my testimony. The thing is I've never really had a sense that my life was without Him. I can think of half-a-dozen or so times that I've specifically stopped to ask Him into my heart. There have been some significant people who God used to confront me with the authenticity of my faith. There are several significant events in my life that God has used to teach me what it means to be His. In it all, I'm hard pressed to identify a time when my life was effectively B.C.
My theology and my heart both tell me that my salvation has far more to do with Christ and what he's done in my life than any decision I have ever made or any word I may have spoken. By His grace, God has always provided enough light in my life to help me clearly identify when I've stepped into way too much darkness and provided the forgiveness needed to be made right with Him. In His steadfast love He has slowly but surely drawn me closer, asking for a deeper and deeper commitment . That's where I find myself; always in need, always loved. Lord make me more worthy of that kind of love each day. Whatever life is without Christ, I don't want to know.

No-Cost Envangelism?

It's funny. I started this blog a few days ago thinking I would journal bits and pieces of my own faith journey. I have not felt led to write anything until today and this first post has more to do with my church than it does me...not that the two aren't intertwined.

Our church is over 125 years old. Presbyterian. Perhaps dying.

Our most recent pastorate ended in duress after a fairly long tenure of 10 years. This was the third pastorate in a row to end in this manner. Despite it all God has been good. In Him there is hope. We are currently in an interim pastorate period. Our interim has the session studying Martha Grace Reese's book Unbinding the Gospel. I have been struck by how pointedly it's message speaks to our congregation. Much of it's message stresses the evangelistic purpose of the church. In the seventh chapter it suggests that evangelism is occurring when you can answer 'Yes' to either of these two questions.

1. Are we helping this person move into relationship with God?
2. Are we helping this person move into Christian community?

I can pretty much agree with that suggestion. The kicker is this. To help someone in this way requires a relationship; an investment; an involvement in someone else's life that demands a love and commitment that can often be risky, sticky and messy. Most of us (and yes there is an 'I' in 'Us') have trouble with that. We're good with the occasional helping hand and promise of prayer but fall short of the kind of commitment really required. Imagine if God level of commitment was the same towards us.